


My Centipede (May change title as story progresses)

by bunnibuns



Series: What are friends for? [2]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Child Abuse, Eating Disorders, Eventual Smut, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rape Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-03-26 19:08:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13864116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bunnibuns/pseuds/bunnibuns
Summary: Kaneki deals with a troubled past, but his best friend Hide will always be there to help him through it. What he doesn't know is that Hide has a crush on Kaneki. Hide doesn't expect anything in return from Kaneki.I really suck at summaries.





	1. Hospitals and Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> New writer, story is in progress. I have no idea what I'm doing yet. I'm just angry at all the half finished stories on here and wanted do try my own. Im a college student so I can't promise an update schedule.

Kaneki Ken and Hide had always been friends. Hide met Kaneki in grade school when he was new. He had noticed that Kaneki kept to himself, preferring the company of books over people. Hide never had trouble making friends before, but chose Kaneki because of a lonely arua that seemed to ooze off him, and Hide knew that he would be the one to help him. Hide made friends with Kaneki that day and he had already seemed slightly better. Hide promised himself he would always be there for Kaneki no matter what happened. Which is why he was upset that Kaneki had been ignoring him after his dismissal from the hospital.

Hide had tried to call, and text Kaneki, and had even tried to visit him while he was in the hospital, even if the staff just turned him away. “Mr. Kaneki has advised us no visitors are welcome.” That happy nurse seemed to eager to tell him after his 4th time visiting, err trying to visit anyways. Still, when Hide bugged the nurse enough she let him know Kaneki would be released from the hospital the following day. _‘Finally, I’ll be able to seem him and find out what the hell has been going on’_. Hide thought to himself and turned to leave the hospital. That's what landed him here, in the middle of the store late in the afternoon, picking out Kaneki's favorite foods hoping to help him get better faster so he didn’t have to suffer through the classes at Kami University alone anymore. _‘What a selfish prick, I cannot believe he has left me alone at school all this time.’_ Hide thought, as he pulled all the food out of his basket and loaded it onto the conveyor belt to be scanned and bagged by the all to happy girl at the check stand. The girl tried to make small talk with him, but Hide was to busy thinking about how he could get Kaneki to talk to him about what happened. All he knows is that Kaneki went on a date with some girl he met at a Cafe, then Hide saw his face plastered on the news saying that some college students had been involved in an accident involving steel beams.

Kaneki was always a really shy person, feeling like he bothered people with his problems. That was mostly his abusive mothers doing, tell him things like “Kaneki dear, remember is always better to be hurt, than to hurt others”. So Hide knew it would be very difficult to get Kaneki to agree to let him help, and to open up about that exactly had happened. Hide marched down the road towards Kaneki’s apartment. Once he had arrived he found he had no way to actually get into the apartment to leave the snacks, and other foods Hide had bought. Huffing, and mad about him not thinking, he began the walk back to his own apartment. He would have to stop back in the morning to figure out how to get the stuff to Kaneki, he had classes tomorrow and couldn’t skip again.

 

**_“Huh? K-K-Kaneki? What’s g-going on? Did you get out of t-t-the hospital early or something?” Hide felt Kaneki’s hands start to play with his blond hair, and slowly start moving down the back of his neck. “Shh, you’re talking way to much.” Kaneki’s hands slowly starting to message Hide’s shoulders. “I’m just r-really confused, and why are you touching me like this? Mhmm.” Hide’s body shivering slightly at the soft, comforting feeling of Kaneki's hands slowly moving around his neck and shoulders. “Shhh. Hide, just relax and let me help you relax.” Hide closed his eyes for a moment, an Mhmm was all he could manage. Kaneki’s hands stopped moving and Hide opened his eyes, finding Kaneki’s face to close to his, and suddenly lips on his. Moving ever so slightly to give him a soft kiss. A small gasp escaped Hide’s throat and Kaneki looked up at him. “Im sorry, is this not ok?” Slowly backing up until Hide thought to grab onto his wrist. “No this is fine, I’m actually just…. I don’t even know. I can’t think.” Kaneki nodded, and resumed kissing Hide._ **

***Beep Beep Beep Beep***  
Hides alarm blaring, and bright numbers blinking 6:00 AM woke him from his dream. Hide slowly opened his eyes and felt a throbbing need below his boxers. “Urghh! Why the hell does this keep happening? Kaneki is a friend, and friend only! You stupid dick! Quit being a pain in the ass!” This was definitely not the first time Hide had had a dream about Kaneki, but normally a cold shower would fix the problem. Hide grabbed a change of clothes and walked towards the bathroom, getting a towel out of his linen closet before reaching the bathroom. “At least I didn’t need a change of sheets this time around.” Hide thought aloud. No one was there to hear him anyways, Kaneki was the only other one who was ever here and he was in a hospital room downtown.

As he climbed into the shower he noticed how painful his arousal was. ‘A cold shower might not do the trick this time. I guess it has been awhile since I’ve done anything. Why not?’ Hide decided a quick rub session wouldn’t put that much of a dent in his day before he went to school, and hopefully it wouldn’t be a problem tonight. After he had finished with his arousal he quickly showered and toweled off, remembering he had to drop off the food at Kaneki’s, he looked down at his clock. “Dang I really have to get better at doing that, now I’m going to have to rush around to get to class on time.” Hide got dressed quickly and jogged out the door with the bag of food, and a crudely drawn picture on a note for Kaneki to read when he got home from the hospital.


	2. Sodas and Showers.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaneki gets released from the hospital, and takes a shower. Hide needs a soda and finds Kaneki in the middle of something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This are going to get *slightly* saucy in this chapter. Be warned.

"Mr. Kaneki, just remember all your after surgery instructions and call us if you need anything or if you have any questions. Goodbye!" The nurse shook hands with Kaneki and let him walk out the front doors of the hospital. As he was making his way home he pulled out his phone and saw 30 missed calls and 87 new text messages from Hide. Kaneki decided to ignore them for now and kept walking home. When he did arrive at his front door he noticed a bag hanging on his door handle. He picked it up and looked at the note, seeing the poorly drawn picture, he knew immediately it was from Hide. He took the bag inside with him and set it on the counter. He needed a shower before he could even think about doing anything else.

  _'Ugh hospitals make me feel so gross. Funny, they reek of antiseptics and make ME feel gross.'_ Kaneki started undressing for the shower when his phone went off again, Hide calling again.  _'Guess he is going to want some kind of explanation about what happened.'_ Kaneki picked it up and started walking back towards the front room. Sitting down, and finally swiping the screen on his phone to answer the call. Hides screeching of Kaneki's name filled his ears, and he momentarily pulled the phone away before returning it to say hello. "Kaneki, man, what the hell has been going on? I saw you had been in an accident but no one at the hospital would let me see you. Why would you have them turn away your best and only friend?" Sighing heavily Kaneki thought for a moment what he wanted to do with this situation. "Yeah, that girl I went on a date with was crazy. Go ahead and come over, Ill leave my door unlocked but I'm getting in the shower. Ill tell you everything that happened when you get here, and Hide.... Never mind. See you in a bit. Bye" Kaneki disconnected the call before Hide had a chance to say anything else, or try to interrogate him over the phone.

Kaneki was just relieved he could finally get in the shower. Looking down he blushed realizing he had been sitting on his couch in nothing but his boxer shorts. He hurried and unlocked the door and walked to the bathroom, happy he could finally get the antiseptic smells off him, forgetting to lock the bathroom door. He had been in the shower about 10 minutes before he heard a knock on the door, assuming it was Hide he called out "Its open, come on it." To focused on scrubbing his skin raw trying to get the nasty smell off him to actually get out and open the door for Hide. He heard some noises coming from his kitchen, what sounded like the fridge opening and closing. "Hey, I'm taking one of these sodas from the fridge." He didn't respond, knowing Hides voice. He went back to trying to get the smell off his skin and started washing his hair. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Not hearing a response from Kaneki about the soda he walked towards the bathroom. _'Maybe he didn't hear me?'_ He tried the handle and it opened the door. Hide started to walk into the bathroom before thinking, _"What the hell am I doing? This is Kaneki, in the shower. I didn't expect him to leave the bathroom door unlocked though. Maybe just a quick peek inside? It will definitely help me next time I have a dream like I did this morning. Maybe then I can actually get further than kissing in the dreams.'_ Quietly Hide opened the door to the bathroom just a bit more. Enough to see Kaneki in the shower, with his eyes closed and soap dripping down his gorgeous body. Hide's breath caught in his throat, and he immediately felt all of his body heat move lower, straight below his belt buckle. He silently looked over Kaneki's body, trying to commit every inch of it to memory for later. Kaneki turned to towards the shower head to rinse off the soap and shampoo and Hide got a full frontal view of Kaneki's body. He looked so damn hot, with soap and water dripping off his body, but Hide also noticed how skinny he looked.

Skin stretched to tightly over bone, that protruded to far out. Hide was immediately concerned but knew now, with him gawking at his best friend naked in the shower, was NOT the time to bring it up. Hide slowly backed out of the bathroom and shut the door quietly and made his way back to the kitchen. With a tent popping in his pants, he decided to just sit down on the couch with a blanket on his upper legs and pulled one of Kaneki's books off the shelf near by.  _'Another depressing story, how typical. God Kaneki, don't you ever read anything remotely happy?'_ Minutes later he heard the shower shut off in the bathroom, and he cracked open the very worn, very read book, trying to defuse the situation in his pants. He knew this was one of Kaneki's favorite books, that much was clear by how worn the book was, so he took slight care in opening it to the beginning and started reading. Smiling brightly as he read some of Kaneki's notes on the side of the page about little details he had picked up re-reading the story hundreds of times.  

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kaneki was washing his hair when he thought he heard the bathroom door open, he didn't pay any attention to it because he didn't hear anything else.  _'I must be really tired. I'll just finish washing my hair quickly then get out and talk to Hide for a bit before going to bed'_ He started to turn around when he heard a small gasp. I opened his eyes slightly careful not to get any shampoo into his eyes. What he saw almost made him yell out in surprise. He saw hide, standing in the doorway staring at his legs and his dick. Kaneki closed his eyes again, trying to think of something else so his latest dream didn't come popping back into his head, making him aroused. He didn't want Hide to see that at all. It was bad enough that he was having dreams of his best friend but to get an erection thinking about his friend joining him in the shower was out of the question. He didn't stop to think about what Hide was doing in his bathroom anyways, maybe he needed something and didn't think about it? Hide did some pretty stupid stuff sometimes.

Kaneki just turned around completely and focused on getting the shampoo out of his hair. He heard the bathroom door shut again and let out a breath he wasn't aware he had been holding.  _'What the heck was that? Maybe I had just imagined that, there is no way Hide was just in my bathroom with me in the shower. Looking at me like THAT. I must be more tired than I thought. Maybe this is a side effect of a pill they have me on for recovery?'_ Confident it had been a hallucination Kaneki turned off the shower and started toweling off. He got dress, brushed his teeth and brushed his hair and made his way out of the bathroom into the kitchen were no Hide was found. He walked into the living room and saw Hide sitting on the couch reading his favorite book at the moment, Black Goats Egg, with a blanket around his legs and smiling brightly like the book was the funniest thing he'd ever seen. "What are you smiling at Hide? Please be careful with that book, its my favorite and I don't have money to replace it if you ruin it." His ears were met with laughter from Hide. "I'm reading your little notes that are on all these pages. I think its cute how you leave yourself little notes in your books." The room was immediately silent, and Kaneki turned a light shade of pink on his face, ears and neck.

"Errm, did you just say I was cute?" With the realization of what he had said, Hide also had a light blush brush his checks. "Uhh, Yeah.. In a cute kid way?" Hide mused a small forced sounding chuckle at his own reply, and was met with Kaneki nodding. "Right. Okay."  _'I cannot believe he just said that. What the actual fuck is going on?'_ "Well I'm actually really tired, the medication the doctor gave me is make me really tired and slightly dizzy, is it okay if you come back another time and we can talk about what happened?" Kaneki cautiously tried to move the conversation on so that he could be alone, now that he had been thinking about Hide joining him in the shower, and about Hide calling him cute. "Uhh, yeah that would be fine. Just call me and let me know when you feel up to it." Hide stood up, placing the book too slowly down on the coffee table. Hugged Kaneki awkwardly and walked out the front door with a waive goodbye. As soon as Hide had no chance of hearing him Kaneki sighed loudly, "What the actual fuck is going on right now? This has been the most awkward time we've ever had." Kaneki thought back to through the long time him and Hide had been friends, only finding one other awkward encounter, when Hide was 15 and Kaneki was 14. Hide having already gone through parts of puberty and was experimenting with his sexuality was kissing another boy when Kaneki had open the door to his room and Hide just blushed and pushed the other boy off his bed. With that thought Kaneki gave up on finding the medication bottle and settled on going to bed and thinking about it tomorrow, when he hopefully would feel less disoriented. 


	3. Sticky Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaneki has a dream about Hide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly more graphic, be warned. 
> 
> Thanks for the review! I'm going to try and break up the paragraphs a little better. Let me know if its any better!   
> Bold Italics will be dreams; And Italics will be thoughts.

Kaneki was glaring at the clock on his night stand, the red numbers burning his eyes as he slowly started to drift off to sleep. 

_**"Oh Kaneki, what are you doing to yourself? You need to eat so you can recover." Hide looked up at Kaneki sadly, while slowly walking towards him with a hand stretched out towards him. "Hide, I'm fine, you don't need to worry about me, worry about yourself. How are your classes going at Kami?" Kaneki's reply was soft, but rugged. He hated talking about eating. It always made him feel disappointed with himself.**_ _**Just then Hide opened a can of shaken up soda, causing a big sticky mess all of Kaneki and Hide. "Oops, I'm sorry Kaneki. Lets hop in the shower real quick and get cleaned off?" Hide spoke while looking directly into Kaneki's deep gray eyes.** _

_**"O-okay. Why d-don't you go ahead and shower first?" Kaneki felt flushes just thinking about Hide being in the shower with him. "No way, Just get in with me. We can save time and water that way." Before Kaneki could reply he felt Hide grabbing his wrist and pulling him towards the bathroom. The next thing to meet Kaneki's eyes is a naked form a Hide. His slightly tanned skin, and beautiful smile was almost enough to make him melt. Until he looked down and got a full view of Hide's Chest, arms, legs, and his glorious cock. Kaneki was hard instantly and couldn't help but to look up and down Hide's full length. It looked to be about 3 inches wide, and about 8 or 9 inches long. "Oh H-hide..." Kaneki was swept up in a kiss, rough and begging for attention.** _

_**He felt a small lick along his bottom lip, begging his for entry into his mouth. Kaneki gave into Hide with a slight shiver, moaning as Hide's tongue slipped into his mouth, tasting him. Finally in the shower Hide started to move lower, down Kaneki's jaw, kissing and nipping making his way down to Kaneki's chest. Kaneki laced his fingers in Hide's hair and started panting as Hide found a nipple and gave it a slight nibble, causing Kaneki to moan Hide's name.  "I can't wait to suck the cock, Kaneki. It looks like you haven't been giving it enough attention." Hide slowly bent down and planted a kiss on the top of Kaneki's ridged cock. Hide gave a light laugh and took Kaneki's full length into his mouth, causing Kaneki to gasp as he felt the back of Hide's throat. Hide began rocking his mouth back and forth over Kaneki's length and working his hand up and down the part that wouldn't fit down his throat. Kaneki was a moaning, shivering mess in no time at all. "H-h-hide. S-stop. I'm g-g-going to c-cum. Mhm Hide." Hide ignored Kaneki's pleas and stuffed more of his cock down** _ **his** _**throat, swallowing every last drop of cum that Kaneki's cock spit out.** _

__

Kaneki woke up as he came in his dream, waking to soaked, sticky boxers.  _'Damn it.'_ Was the only thought Kaneki had before getting up to change his clothes and get a new set of sheet.  _'What is wrong with me?  You'd think I was still 14 by the amount of wet dreams that I have.'_ After changing his clothes and sheets he picked up his phone, saw the time was 7:00 AM and decided to be up for the day. Looking through his missed text messages while he was asleep, found 3 from hide. 

**NEW TEXT; HIDE:**

**6:05 AM;**

**Subject: School**

Hey buddy I know its pretty early and you might not be up yet, but I'd love to see you at school today. LMK! 

 

**NEW TEXT; HIDE:**

**6:40 AM;**

**Subject: Rabbits die of loneliness.**

Hey looks like you wont be at school again today You know rabbits die of loneliness? I could be dead right now. =(

 

**NEW TEXT; HIDE:**

**6:58 AM;**

**Subject:**

Okay, okay let me know when you want to talk again. im free after class. =)

 

Kaneki sighed,  _'Its too late for school today, maybe I'll try again tomorrow. I'll make sure I set my alarm so I can actually make it to class.'_ At the thought he decided to text Hide back. 

**SENT TEXT; To HIDE:**

**7:07 AM;**

**Subject: Tomorrow**

Hey Hide Ill be in classes tomorrow, Im going to set my alarm and everything. Come over tomorrow after class and we can talk about things. 

 

After a dream like he had this morning, he wasn't quite ready to face Hide yet. He needed a day to let himself calm down before he did anything to sudden. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

 

 


	4. Totally not a date.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide goes to coffee shop, and drags Kaneki out. Not a date, definitely not a date. Even though Kaneki wish it was a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight gore and death in this chapter. 
> 
> So I've loosely taken the idea that there are not going to be ghouls per say. Aogiri will be a gang, and the organ harvesters will be called ghouls, which Kaneki will be lightly associated with. But that's about as far as I've gotten in my story draft. 
> 
> I really love an abused Kaneki and a supportive Hide, so get ready with some deep shit in future chapters. Rape, eating disorders, and possible self harm.

3 Days after Kaneki's release from the hospital;

"Hey man, have you been eating right? You're looking a little pale. You need to eat better if you're going to stay healthy." Hide looked at Kaneki and all Kaneki could do was look down.  _'You can never get anything past Hide.'_ Kaneki thought. "Uh right, okay." Hide has always known Kaneki had an eating problem, claiming to be to busy with school work to eat, or that he had already eaten. Hide knew this was just an excuse to hide his eating problems. Hide also knew that the eating disorder stems from his abusive childhood with his evil mother and her gang. Kaneki's mother was a drug runner for a gang called Aogiri. They were one of the biggest gangs in Tokyo history. They ran drugs, and they ran black market organs. Something Kaneki never wanted to be involved it, as it had eventually gotten his mother killed when she wasn't able to meet the sale quota one month a few years ago. Kaneki still had nightmares about the people who broke into his home one night and brutally murdered his mother in front of him. He had been warned that when they needed him, they would come. 

_'Mom? Whats going on?' Kaneki tried to open his eyes and was met with darkness only. He tried to reach up to his eyes only to find his hands tied behind his back around a chair from their dinning room table. They must have a blindfold on me, he thought with his concern growing. The ghouls, organ harvesters, from his mothers gang could be heard moving around the small apartment. His mother must be making another pick up from them, but they had never tied him up and blindfolded him before. And there had never been this amount of tension in the air before either. One of the ghouls heard Kaneki calling out to his mother and moved towards Kaneki. 'Look at this one guys, he looks nice and ripe. I bet we could get a lot for his organs.' one of the ghouls stepped closer to him and lifted the blindfold from his eyes. Kaneki blinked, trying to get his eyes to adjust to the sudden spill of light reaching his eyes. 'J-Jason? What is going on? W-_ _Wheres my mom?' Kaneki visibly paled at the sight of Jason. He was one of the bigger, more intimidating ghouls from Aogiri. Jason simply laughed and pointed his fingers with claw like rings towards the kitchen floor. Kaneki screamed when he saw his mother laying in a puddle of blood on the floor, pale from blood loss, and eyes fogged over. She looked like she was inches from death, with a gaping hole in her stomach._

Hide spoke up, snapping Kaneki back into reality. "Hey, lets stop at that coffee shop down the street, where you met that girl and talk about what happened. We could get some coffee and a snack. We can talk about your classes too." Hide started walking towards the cafe, Kaneki following in step. 'Yeah sure." Kaneki's reply just above a whisper, shivering slightly as the memorize of the gang who stole his mothers life. Hide noticed Kaneki's shiver and wrapped his arm around his shoulders pulling him closer, milking a blush out of Kaneki. "Hide, I'm not a kid, you don't need to try and give me all your body heat. I'm fine really." Hide gave a small nod as they turned a corner onto the street that held the coffee shop, Anteiku. They stepped inside and Hide dropped his arm from Kaneki's shoulders to take a seat at a small booth in the back area of the shop, out of ear shot from the other customers. A girl with blue hair and a sour scowl on her face walked up to their table "What'll you have?" She asked being less than friendly. "Ill take a latte with some of that adorable latte art and a chocolate muffin. What about you Kaneki?" "Just coffee, black please, thank you Touka." Kaneki had remembered her name from the last time him and Hide had been there. Last time, when he was waiting for Rize to show up so he could ask her out. With their orders in Touka walked away to get started.

Hide started talking as soon as Touka had walked away. "So tell me, what happened out on that date? How did you get in that accident?"  _'Wow, Hide doesn't waste anytime cutting right to the point.'_ Kaneki thought. "Uh, Well. We had a good date, I don't think I would have went on another with her just because there was no click. But she wanted me to walk her home because she lives in an area with active ghouls. We started walking and she shoved me down an ally way and started talking about Jason and how he needed me." Kaneki stopped to relax his muscles that tensed at the sound of Jason's name. "I guess thats all I remember before waking up in the hospital. They told me I had been in an accident where steel beams fell from an overhead work sight and that I needed some organ transplant." Touka walked up to them and placed their orders on the table and Kaneki picked his coffee up, relaxing more at the warm feeling spreading through his hands, and up his arms. "Thank you, that should be everything for now." Hide smiled brightly at her and she scuffed and walked away, mumbling something about stupid teenagers taking up her booths. Hide sighed and turned back to Kaneki "Wow some nice place for a date right?" Kaneki blushed, "Is this a d-date?" Hide turned away, trying to hide the blush rising on his checks before replying, "Yeah a friend date. Duh" 

Hide and Kaneki talked a bit more before getting an angry glare from Touka at the front counter. "Guess we should start to head out, looks like they are starting to close." Kaneki looked out the window by their booth and noticed how dark it had gotten. "Yeah I guess you're right Hide. You want to come over to my place and watch some crappy horror movies?" Kaneki knew crappy horror movies where Hide's favorite. They left some cash on the table for their coffee and muffin and headed out the door. The walk back to Kaneki's apartment being quiet and slightly awkward after Hide's mention of a date. "Hey Kaneki, I'm really glad that you're back in school. Its been really boring without you." Hide trying to start a conversation to hide the awkward aura he was feeling from Kaneki, without receiving a reply he kept talking. "So, uh... Are you going to try and meet some other girls? Or do you plan on staying single for awhile? I guess after that date you might be turned off girls for awhile."  _'Ohh hide, I've always been turned off from girls. If only you knew.'_ Was Kaneki's only thought as they reached his front door. Stepping inside and aside so Hide could come in as well. "Why don't you go sit down and pick out a movie, and I'll make some popcorn and bring in some drinks." Hide nodded and walked towards a shelf with all of Kaneki's really old, crappy movies. 

Hide and Kaneki were sitting on the couch under a shared blanket laughing at the horrid attempt at gore on the T.V. screen.  _'Oh man if only they knew what the organs really looked like after being ripped from someones guts.'_ Kaneki thought as he started to close his eyes. He was starting to drift off into sleep when he felt Hide shift to move his head onto his shoulder. Kaneki didn't argue because it was more comfortable. He listened to Hide's soft breathing and was lulled off into a stiff, uncomfortable nightmare filled sleep. 

_**'Kaneki! Help me! They are going to hurt me!' Kaneki could hear his mother screaming. He opened his eyes to find himself tied to a chair watching as Jason ripped his mothers stomach open and started licking the blood dripping down his hands. 'Oh Kaneki, your mothers blood is absolutely divine. I cannot wait until I can try yours!~' Jason said sweetly in a sing song voice. Kaneki began screaming and wiggling trying to help his mother to no avail. 'Mom! I'm sorry!'  Hearing Jason starting to let out an evil sounding laugh as Kaneki began crying.** _

__Kaneki was shaken awake by Hide. "KANEKI! Wake up! You're having another nightmare!" Kaneki slowly opened his eyes, finding himself in Hide's lap, face and body wet from sweat, and tears. 'I'm sorry Hide. I.. I.. This medication is giving me nightmares." Was all Kaneki could mutter, just above a whisper. "Kaneki you don't need to apologize to me. I know what you went through. Was it another nightmare about your mom?" Kaneki nodded. "Lets go lay down in your bed, and try and calm down. How does that sound?" "Thank you Hide." Kaneki said as he tried to stand, and stumbled as his legs started to shake below his body weight. "Kaneki let me help." Hide slowly wrapped his arms around Kaneki helping him stand. Kaneki looked up to find Hide to close to his face, and Hide without thinking moved down to kiss Kaneki. A light kiss, with no urgency. Kaneki stiffened at the contact and let out a small surprised yelp. Hide felt Kaneki stiffen and went red, and pulled away. "Uhh, Kaneki? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that." Hide stuttered out.


	5. New Beginning?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaneki and Hide spend some time together after Hide's shocking kiss. Hide finds something surprising in Kaneki's past and current additions. 
> 
> Smut; Implied drug use; Implied self harm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I mention i love a weak abused Kaneki? Because its my guilty pleasure. Mwahahah.

"Uhh, Kaneki? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that." Hide stuttered out.  _'Wow, I've done some stupid things before, but I cannot believe I just KISSED Kaneki! What if he kicks me out and doesn't want to be friends anymore?'_ Hide's mind was moving 100 miles a minute and he couldn't get it to shut up.  _'Oh god, what if I make his nightmares worse? What if I make his eating problems worse by adding additional stress?'_ "H-hide? Um, did you just k-kiss me?" Kaneki looked up at Hide with confusion, and lust in his deep gray eyes. 

 _'That kiss was amazing.'_  Kaneki's only thought asHide looked up at him seeing the confusion, and what appeared to be lust in his eyes. "Can I do that again?" Hide asked as a light shade of pink appeared on his checks. Kaneki responded by leaning into Hide more, pressing his lips into Hide's lightly moaning. Feeling Kaneki grabbing him and actually kissing him made Hide smile slyly and Hide pulled Kaneki closer until he was supporting all of Kaneki's weight. Hide pulled away from Kaneki in favor of oxygen, and because he was starting to shake "Lets go lay down on your bed? As mush as I love holding you up, I'm starting to shake." Hearing and feeling no resistance, Hide started pulling Kaneki towards his bedroom, closing the door before falling onto the bed pulling Kaneki on top of him. 

Hide pulled Kaneki's face up towards him, "I've wanted to kiss you for so long Kaneki. I never thought I would ever get the chance to actually do it. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up alone in my bed." 

"I'm right here Hide. You're not waking up alone."

Kaneki began kissing Hide again, slowly but with a building desire. A burning lust, deep in his groin, that has been pushed down and denied for to long starting to surface. Hide began breathing heavily as he felt the need in Kaneki's kiss. Kaneki sighed deeply when he felt Hide's tongue glide along his bottom lip, begging for entry into his mouth.  _'Oh god, I can't wait to taste-'_ Kaneki's thought was cut short when he parted his lips and allowed Hide's tongue to press into his mouth, eliciting a low moan buried within his chest. Hide's manhood began throbbing at the delicious sounds he was hearing. Between the moaning and the heavy breathing, Hide began a quick decent into arousal.

Kaneki grabbed Hide's neck to deepen the kiss as the other hand snaked around to his lower back. Breaking for oxygen, Hide decided Kaneki was over dressed for the occasion. "Can I help you out of that shirt?" Kaneki let go of Hide and started removing his sweater that he had been wearing and tossing it aside, blushing.  _'Ill pick it up later.'_ Kaneki started playing with the hem of Hide's to bright yellow shirt. "It looks like your attire needs removal as well." Hide was more than happy to oblige, smiling happily. With Kaneki's shirt out of the way Hide began stroking his back lightly and laying soft kisses down his jaw, neck and pale chest.  _'I'm going to have to talk to him about eating, he has lost to much weight since his accident.'_ Still enjoying the time they were spending together Hide tossed his thought aside in favor of kissing Kaneki's sweet, soft lips again. 

Hide began moving his hands from Kaneki's back, up to his neck and down his chest, stopping only when he had found a nipple. He started to establish a pattern of rubbing his chest, and alternating between his nipples, pinching and rubbing in light circles. Kaneki began grinding against Hide in an attempt to bring some relief to the growing bulge in his pants. Kaneki noticed Hide's own member was stiff against his, still encased in his pants. "Hide, I need more. Please?" The sound of Kaneki begging caused Hide's cock to stir more as he helped Kaneki remove his pants. As he removed Kaneki's pants he noticed a pill bottle fall out of one of the pockets. He stopped what he was doing to pick up the pill bottle before reading what it was. ' _Narcotics? What does Kaneki have these for? This bottle is almost empty too, if the doctor gave these to him there is no way it should be almost empty already.'_ Hide's concern for Kaneki over shadowed his arousal from the current make out session. "Kaneki? What is this?" Hide spoke lowly holding up the pill bottle so Kaneki could see it.

"Huh? Oh, uh.. Those.. That's the medication the doctor gave me. To help with the pain." Kaneki looked like he was about to be sick, or have a panic attack. 

"Why is this bottle almost empty then? It says you should only be taking 3 a day for a month. There should be way more in here." Hide was starting to feel as sick as Kaneki looked.  _'Please don't tell me your abusing these!'_ Hide almost screamed aloud. He started to put information together, noticing the way Kaneki was more tired than usual and how he looked dazed more so than usual, and that clouded haze in his eyes. "Kaneki, tell me the truth." Hide was starting to breath heavy as he tried to keep a lid on the anger he was feeling for the first time towards his best friend. Hearing the exasperated fury in Hide's voice, Kaneki looked down at his feet, and noticed the cuts creeping up from the edge seam of his socks. He got up quickly and ran into the bathroom, tears streaking down his face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading thus far! Please leave me a review and let me know what you're thinking so far, because I'm literally winging it!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. I decided this needed a short prologue, so I focused on that for a bit. That's done and I'm back on this story now. Sorry for the short chapter as well, I have a butt ton of school work I need to do.

Hide ran after Kaneki, and was stopped by Kaneki slamming the bathroom door in his face. "Kaneki, please talk to me! I want to help you. I'm not mad about it. Please, lets just talk about this!" Hide's concern was growing with every struggled sob coming from behind the bathroom door. He heard Kaneki throw up in the bathroom. He started banging on the door again, in a final attempt to get Kaneki to open it. 

"Hide, please leave me alone. I don't want to talk about it!" Kaneki said through muffled sobs. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror.  _'Wow I look terrible. How could anyone love me?'_ Kaneki thought as he punched the mirror causing it to shatter. Blood started to run down his wrist and he felt a sweet release, watching the blood drip down from his hands down his wrist.  

Hide heard a loud shatter from inside the bathroom and slid down the door. Sitting down with his face in his hands on his knees he left out a soft cry. "Kaneki, please." Hide knew what would happen if he didn't get Kaneki to open the door. Kaneki would sit in the bathroom all night hurting himself because of the guilt. Hide was about to pull out his phone to call the police to stop Kaneki from doing just that when he heard that bathroom doors lock click. 

Hide stood up and reached for the door when Kaneki pulled it open. Hide saw Kaneki's tear streaked face and looked down at him holding his hand in a red tinged towel. "Hide, don't cry. Please." Kaneki said as he walked passed Hide into the kitchen pulling some band-aids out of the drawer. "Let me help you. Please?" Hide stood next to Kaneki, hands stretched out waiting for Kaneki's. Kaneki sighed and put his hand in Hide's. Once he'd pulled the towel off Kaneki's hand his face went pale. 

He saw multiple cuts running across his knuckles, and some cuts running over his wrist. He sat Kaneki down on the floor and went to grab a small rag to clean him up before placing antibiotic ointment and band-aids over the cuts. "Kaneki this isn't going to be enough. I'll run to the convenience store and pick up some gauze and a wrap for you. Do you need anything else?" Kaneki shook his head looking down at the ground and Hide walked him into the front room and sat him on the couch, wrapped him in a blanket and handed him the rag. "Hold this on your wrist firmly until I get back." 

While Hide was at the store Kaneki stood and walked into his room to get his medication the doctor had given him. He looked around the room looking for the orange bottle and was confused when he couldn't find it. Hide must have taken the pills so he couldn't take anymore.  __Deciding that he wasn't going to find them he pulled a book from his shelf and went to sit back down on the couch and wait for Hide to return.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the Kudos!


	7. Old Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide goes to the store to pick up some first aid supplies and runs into an old friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please excuse my epic fail of not posting anything new for so long. I'm a premed student and extremely busy with school. I've got a few new chapters I'm working on now, so maybe 2-3 chapters this week?

Hide closed the door of Kaneki's apartment and started walking towards the convince store that was just a few blocks away. He was trying to piece together everything that had happened in the last few hours.  _'Okay so I kissed Kaneki, and he kissed me back. The kissing started to get a little too heated and I took his pants off. The orange pill bottle, thats what happened next.'_

As much as Hide was trying to ignore the pill bottle and think around it he couldn't help but know that Kaneki was abusing them. Hide had seen signs of drug abuse in the past during his friendship with Kaneki, but nothing was ever solid, and it didn't seem like Kaneki was the type of person to do that sort of thing.

_'Kaneki also doesn't seem like the type of person to talk about his problems. So even if he was abusing drugs its not like he would actually tell me anything about it.'_

Hide walked into the convince store, saying a polite hello to the cashier, and walked towards the first aid area and grabbed some gauze, medicated ointment and medical tape. He stood there for a minute thinking about what he could do to help Kaneki, not looking around or paying any attention to the happenings around him.  He turned to walk towards the cash register and bumped into a girl with blue hair and was about to apologize when she turned around and glared at him. 

"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING STUPID!" The girl with blue hair yelled. 

Hide turned away from her and felt tears pricking his eyes. "I'm sorry, I've got a lot on my mind. Please excuse me." 

"Hide? Is that you?" The girl with blue hair grabbed his shoulder to turn him around. 

"Touka? Oh my god, its been so long. I'm so sorry. I've had a really rough night." Hide let out a small shaky sigh and blinked back the tears the were threatening to fall.

"Oh I'm really sorry to hear that. If you want to talk about it I'd be happy to listen. I've got a coffee shop down the street I work at, its after hours so it will just be us." 

Hide thought about it for a moment, knowing he needed to get back to Kaneki's apartment to administer the first aid he needed.  _'Ah, he'll probably be fine for a bit. I bet he's already fallen asleep on his couch with his nose shoved in a depressing book.'_

"You know what Touka, I'd love to join you. Thanks."

Hide and Touka walked to the front of the store, where Hide completed his purchase for the items, then walked out the store towards the coffee shop Touka worked at. 

XXX

Touka let Hide into the store and flipped the lights on. The store was empty as promised due to it being after hours, but there were noises coming from upstairs. 

"Excuse the noise coming from upstairs, the manager has a few business partners that stay here." Touka waived her hand around a bit to dismiss the noise. 

Hide sat down next to the counter as Touka walked around and started grabbing things needed to make some coffee. Once the coffee was served Touka walked the counter and sat down right next to Hide. 

"So whats on your mind Hide?" Touka asked in a sincere thoughtful manner.

"Well, my friend that I've been super close to for a long time got in an accident awhile ago, he wasn't doing to bad. It seemed like he was actually getting better and back to normal, but tonight I found out that he has been abusing the narcotics that the Doctor prescribed to him. He didn't want to talk about it and ended up locking himself in the bathroom and hurting himself." Hide pushed out almost all the information as fast as he could so he didn't have to relive much of the stress. 

Touka took a long sip of her coffee then replied, "Okay, so if he doesn't want to talk about it, how did you find out? Did he tell you himself, because its wrong to assume things Hide."

"I know that Touka. He didn't exactly tell me, but I know thats whats happening. I've seen signs in the past now, that I ignored or chalked up to other things being wrong. But I found the pill bottle and its almost gone, but it shouldn't be. Hes only been out of the hospital a few days." 

"What do you mean you 'found' the pill bottle? Were you snooping through his stuff or something?" Touka had put her coffee down and had a surprised look on her face. 

"No, no, nothing like that. We were uhh.... Getting a little... Frisky? The pill bottle fell out of his pants right in the middle of something..." Hide turned away to hide the pink tint teasing his cheekbones and the bridge of his nose.   
  


"Ah huh. Okay, I think I understand a bit better. So does your 'friend' have a name, Hide?" Touka spoke out between a laugh at Hide's explanation.

"Yeah, its actually my really old friend... Kaneki Ken. You remember him? I used to hang out with him between classes. I don't think you ever met him, he didn't have any classes together with us." 

Touka choked on the sip of coffee she was taking.  _'Ah shit! That's the guy Jason send Rize out to get!'_

"Excuse me Hide, but did you say Kaneki Ken?" Touka asked while coughing up the coffee that managed to infiltrate her lungs. 

"Yup, the one and only. That I know of at least." 

"Uh, give me just a moment someone's calling my cellphone." Touka said as she got up to go into the upper-stairs area of the coffee shop.

XXX

"Please explain why you feel the need to call me at such a late hour, my dear Touka?"

"Y-yes Mr. Jason, Please forgive the intrusion. I believe I've just found the person you are looking for. Does the name Kaneki Ken mean anything to you?" Touka spoke in a hushed voice, as not to be heard from the person below. 

"Oh yes, do continue." 

"Well sir, it appears I have his boyfriend currently in my shop. I know him from school, and I'm betting he will give me all the information we need to know." 

"Oh well, how sweet. Why don't you go ahead and pack him up and bring him to me? Won't that be such fun."

"Uh, sir? I thought it was just Kaneki-" 

"DO AS YOU'RE TOLD AND DO NOT QUESTION ME!" Jason screamed into the phone, right before cutting the line with a terrified Touka left on the other end. 


	8. Following Orders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide has some troubles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Hide needs some abuse too, but only because it will hurt Kaneki in the long run!

Touka slipped her phone back into her pocket after the call had been disconnected by Jason. 

_'What a jack ass. I can't believe he wants me to fucking believe him.'_

Touka walked into an office looking for its typical occupant, Mr. Yoshimura, the owner of Anteiku and one of the biggest bosses in the ghoul gang. 

"Yoshimura, Jason has provided me with an abduction order and I'll need some help to take care of it. Do you have anyone on hand that can help?"  _'Please don't say Tsukiyama. I hate that creep.'_

"Yes, give me a moment and I will have Tsukiyama help you. May I please be informed where this is going to take place?"

_'Great, just the creep I really didn't want to deal with. Sorry if you get raped or anything Hide.'_

"Uh, yeah thats the thing. The guy is actually downstairs. He's actually a friend from Kamii that has some information Jason wants." Touka slouched away after revealing she knew the abductee, and the fact that Yoshimura didn't like to bring business like this into the shop.  

"Well that makes it concerning, and convenient. Here is a dose, try to poke him in the back of the arm and be ready to catch him about 5 minutes later. This is Ketamine and will render him unconscious for about half and hour. It will cause some memory loss as well, so he won't remember any of this."

"Uh, y-yes sir. Thank you?" Touka added as she took the loaded syringe from Yoshimura and exited the room. 

XXX

 Touka walked back into the cafe, and saw Hide sitting on the stools looking down. Touka took the opportunity to walk behind him and poke the back of his arm with the needle and depress the plunger. 

Hide jumped when he felt something prick in the back of his arm, and he instinctively reached up and grabbed it. 

"What the hell? Touka? What the fuck are you doing? What is that?" 

Hide stood up with the rush of panic spreading through him, bleeding into his veins like fire. 

"I'm sorry Hide, but I have orders to follow."

Touka reached out and pulled Hide into a hug, not knowing if she would ever see him again. Just as Hide started to close his eyes and give into the fog his brain was being exposed to the door bell rang and a loud booming voice spoke.

"Bonne journée mon cher," (Good day my dear friend.) "It seems like you needed some help." Tsukiyama walked over to Touka as Hide collapsed onto the floor. 

"Great, now we have to try and peel him off the floor."

XXX

Once Hide had been pulled off the floor, a bag was placed over his head and Touka and Tsukiyama pulled him through the back of the little coffee shop to load him into a waiting car.  

Touka and Tsukiyama rode in silence on the way to Jason's compound. 

Once they arrived a smaller male with blue hair walked up to the car as Tsukiyama was putting the car in park. 

"Hello Tsukiyama, pleasure to see you again, Touka. Put him in the containment chair in Jason's room." 

"Ayato, why don't you show your big sister some respect." Touka replied to her brother rude greeting. "He's heavy too, so why don't you help carry him up?"

 


End file.
